Reflection In Me

I want to tell....I want to express ...I want to confess....But my heart juz keep on stopping it...

It hurt....pain....scars remaining....so much that I'm tired of it....feeling like giving up everything but still have sumthin that make me change my mind....

I guess im still a weak person from before who cant even help others...sometime it juz too hurt to think when u try to be d best in front of others n the final result is....u still nothing...

Since before...I tried to give all of me in wat i do...maybe not all but at least half or a lil of help from me to others....I want people to realize that im exist in front of them...i dun wanna be popular or want attention from others...but juz some eyes that see the real me is enough...

I feel guilty...when i tried to help someone in need...yet...im so noob n cant even help...always made others angry n not satisfy wif me...i do....i do want so much lend a hand for them...but this person juz not good enuff...

This heart juz cant stand it....when i start to be more hardwork in sumthin n show them i can do it...lastly it remain the same...n people still seeing me in low profile...it hurt that everytime things gonna work out n suddenly it destroy at last minute....it like ur heart stop beating at the same time...n people keep far away from u...thought u ar so helpless....

It pain that i need to accept the truth....I still nothing n cant even show others wat i have....other people seem to be more greater than me that made me shrinking myself...i cant be who i am anymore...i lied to myself....i scare to prove that im good also....fear that people feel annoy wif me n slowly begin to go away from me...I admit that im too coward to take the step...Maybe coz so much betrays...pains n scars that I received made me push away the real me so that I will be less hurt...maybe....n maybe that wat I feel....

"Afraid of my own tears....Keep the Fake me on lingers"

Something to Express

Lately...I feel really down...Far from wat I imagine...not only down...it hurt...I am emo...I know...but not dramatic emo....so much annoying...NO...Im emo...but I dun disturb people...so I dun care wat others saying...If u hate me...go ahead...but only one thing I know...that I dun care...make anything to me...I maybe dun like u..but im lazy to fight wif u...coz even i dun like some people or some things....I hate arguing or fighting for sumthin that I dun feel like it...I dun ruin ur life...so dun interfere mine...

I hate when people suddenly annoys me wif their high status or think them so pro....so wat...I still can accept people bragging or joke bragging....coz that is one of people natural attitude...even I admit that I bragging also...but in this case it another thing which they brag in the same time made u piss off or hurt...dun even care about ur feeling...sometime brag too much that they make u feel like u so weak n cant even be like them...like only them so unique n different in this world...no one else can follow them...urghhhhhhhh plz...

All people have their own talents n weaknesses....accept the truth that even how great n wonderful u are...there are some weakness inside of u....u ar not perfect so dun act like u ar more than perfect...even im not perfect....u can mad n scold me...but u cant push the fact....

I feel more furious when it come to fighting over some ridiculous things...If u want anything or dun satisfy wif me over something that u want....say to me...dun talk behind me or making excuses to others that u ar not satisfy...plus...dun say bad things to others while I was IN FRONT OF u like I'm NOT even there wif u....I can hear n see u mumbling n bla bla bla about me..u think im stone beside u?I know maybe coz u want me to hear ur unsatisfy feelings n try to make me angry or say sumthin to u...if u wan to express it say to my face not to other peoples...im there beside u...dun be so coward....urghhhh~

I try to be nice to all people...I accept them for who they are.....Even got some of things that I dun like about them...I can take it coz even some people dun like something about me...I cant change people...only they can change themselves...so in this point...I juz want them to understand...plz accept other weaknesses...we maybe not very fantastic or cool as u are...but we have heart that need to consider...we are human...we learn from mistakes...dun hurt people feelings wif ur laser mouth...words can make things worse sometime...n can be hurt too...

Lastly....I didnt mean to hate or hurt someone...If wat I said above make some people feel uncomfortable...or not satisfy wif me....so sorry....plz forgive me...I juz wan to say wat I feel...didnt mean to attack someone...or make them sad...politely....so sorry again...I respect u as u respect the way I am... (^-^)