I guess being heartless is more easy than being step by others....it so hurt...the pains cant be explain out...
Maybe im too soft...Maybe im too kind...Maybe im too easy...Maybe im too slow...
Giving advice to someone not so easy...wishing it would be better..it getting worse huh...helping others also not so good as it seem...too much help..so annoying...people think u other way... didnt help also people look down on u....saying too rude...selfish or too ego or something...well that what human is... so unfair..cruel...mean...so am i...i didnt deny it..!!
Expecting that u can be a great frens....guess all no point...every each things that i did...never even reach to any heart....wishing someone can clearly understand n see me...but at the end still the same..im juz nothing....this heart juz like a toy ha...no feeling....can be play easily....go ahead...make fun of it...im emo fine...but...dun u ever feel emo too?
I'm tired...helping someone difficult..lastly the result that will come out is nothing...empty..such hopeless.... as u giving so much in that thing for them....but they didnt even realize u....looks down on u... n even seeing u as annoying...feel u so not helping...dun even hear wat u are saying...
Being in the middle is such a pain...plus wif someone being wif u coz of something they want...or juz for fun when they dun have another person or lonely....it like u a ugly toy...when there no more nice toys...u ar the last one to be pick..maybe not even be pick at all....
Hate when someone asked u for some comfort or maybe wanna ask ur opinion or hear ur story...but it like they the one talk from A to Z...wat the point asking if u wanna talk alone..go ahead...dun even think about other feelings...when u tried so hard to make them comfort..or happy..hoping that wat u say can help..or not a crap...but...they interfere...say this wrong n that wrong...dun even wanna listen...then say bad things to u....better dun even care to ask for help if u only think about urself...
Wanna be kind also hard...hope that people will understand wat i wanna show n give them...i wan them to realize i sincerely luv to help them if they need to...but..if u hate my help or feel annoys wif me..better dun start at all to seek my help...maybe some of my words or help is worthless.. not helping at all..but doesnt mean u need to be so cruel...saying bad things n suddenly left me behind like im a stone....i have feeling like u...same..juz the situation u had different than mine..maybe im not in ur place dunno how to help...yet...y u need to be so mean...
A little help i wish can reach to others heart...at least they see that im really willing to help as i can...i hate to see my frens or family suffering or hurt...i care...so much care...even u see me as a person that not like that also..but inside i really do care...wish them to be happy...even im hurt... as long they still my frens n family...even some of them not really like me or hate me or pretending...i cant change that...coz i know..im also like that....
Juz wish that others see deepest inside me....that i care even for single little things.... but i guess....wishing so much it will reflect back to u....Pain that no one see ur sincerely feeling...
